What is this?

This is a very long, open and public letter to Baby Bean McGyver, the little boy curently residing in my belly, to be evicted in December, likely during Christmas dinner.

I promise to back everything up in print to read to him during the sleepless nights. Oh, and in case you are wondering, the title did come from a horribly catchy Gwen Stefani song that is always stuck in my jukebox brain.

I hope you enjoy reading as much as I enjoy writing. Thanks for stopping by!

Sunday, 8 December 2013

Family photos

Hey baby!

Not a lot to say today, I'm feeling very pregnant, round, large, tired and my feet are swollen. Not a good look, so I'll quickly post some pretty pictures from our shoot and run.

You'll see Pepsi the pooch in the pictures. He's your big brother. No, it makes no difference that he's furry and has four legs. Watch out for your cookies or he'll take them from you. 

Photo credits: Tatiana Resende Photography

Thursday, 5 December 2013

Week 37 - Watermelon baby

Hey baby!

You are now the size of a leek and the weight of a small watermelon, I can feel it all on my lower back. Also, you're all cooked up and done at 37 weeks, just gaining some weight and chilling in the womb from now on.

This is how we look from the outside, from a lovely photoshoot done on Tuesday at the Ashburton Domain with Tatiana. I've always dreamt of taking this photos and having a visual record of the pregnancy. She was kind enough to help us and the result was way beyond what I expected!

Daddy and I have been in a sort of frenzy, getting things done, cars washed, Christmas things sorted, instructions given, bags packed, rooms ready, meals freezed. At 37 weeks, you can come knocking anytime. It's probably the scariest moment of our lives, in true honesty.

Actually, if someone else asks me "So, are you excited?!", I might smack them on the back of the head.

I am terrified. Of course I'm excited, that's a given. But mostly terrified. Scared out of my mind. How can someone not be?? Lives are changing, what we know, what we do, who we are, all of that will fly out the window doing somersaults with the code-phrase "Honey, I think it's time.".
It feels like we're watching a movie that will suddenly be cut off and we're just waiting for that moment when the screen goes blank with a screeching sound. We won't know the ending and something else we never heard of is about to start. It could be a comedy, a drama or a horror movie.

I've never met the people that will come out of the hospital, this new cast - Mommy, Daddy and Ollie. There's also heaps of new characters too: grandmas, grandpas, aunties, auncles. I hope they're all nice, patient, loving, creative and smart.

The next couple of weeks will be insane, I hope I remember to write, but hey, at least summer is here and we can bask in sunshine and hope for wondrous things.

What I'm obsessesd about watching: Scandal on wednesday nights. OMG it's bad, it's good, the coats, the dresses, the side-dish. I hate politics, but wow.

Saturday, 30 November 2013

Oh My Godparents!

Hey baby!

The day before yesterday I happily found out that two wonderful friends of mine are pregnant. They both are very special ladies, very dear to me, with surprising similarities even though they never met and likely never will. They are both gorgeous, caring, kind, smart, funny and to top it all off, they both have a very strong set of beliefs that sets them apart from the ordinary folks. They are women of un-shakable Faith.

You see baby, when you grow up a tad, you'll find that life is a complicated mess and sometimes it feels overwhelming and horrible and dark. It's not, I promise you. That's where we come in. Hang in there, I have a point.

In a while after you're born, you are going to be baptized. We are going to take you to a special place called a Church where a funny looking man in a dress will pour some water over your head, you'll cry, we'll take pictures and that's it. The people who will be there through this process will be my big brother, your Uncle Du and my best friend Mari. Themselves and their amazing partners Auntie Bru and Márcio will be very important people in your life forever. They will be your Jedi masters, your spiritual guides, your safety net.

The reason we do this, chosing these people and having a ceremony, is to give you a very important gift.
We want to give you Faith. I cannot stress this enough: we are giving you Faith. Not a religion. The two are as different as apples and chairs and lots of people get into trouble when they are mixed up.

I am a Catholic, Daddy's too (in some way, shape or form), so we are giving you our Faith the only way we know how, by baptizing you. Doesn't mean it forces you to be Catholic too. As far as religion goes, you are free to pick your own or none, and that's completely ok. Nobody has the right to pick it or force any on you. If they do, there'll be some serious ass-whooping involved. We don't care who you pray to. We don't care if you believe in the details and stories of one or many ancient books or if you worship a Giant White Potato (ok, that might generate some discussion...).

We want to know that when things are hard, you will believe that it will get better, and that you have all these wonderful people to help you through. That's all, that's Faith: believing in love. We want you to feel loved and supported, no matter what you decide to do or whatever pickle you find yourself in. It does get better.

As a loving and caring family, we want you to always have Faith. Faith is a little light that lives inside of you, even when life sucks the light of everything around you. It should never go out. It's this little light that will shine just enough to always give you Hope.

Because no organized religion in the world can give you the reassurance of having Faith and Hope. So these people we chose, plus everybody else in this blessed family, are now in charge of giving you Faith.

Not a random or easy task, and one we thought long about. It's a burden and a joy to give you Faith and we, as parents, can only hope your light never goes out.

What I'm doing: sending happy and healthy vibes to my friends, may their pregnancies be easy and joyful!

P.S. I got a haircut yesterday, so we're all set.

Tuesday, 26 November 2013

Week 35 - Melon Baby

Hey baby!

I remember last week (you know, last week, when I first found out about this pregnancy) going through the week-to-week fruit comparisons and when it got to Honeydew Melon - the 35th week - I just assumed they were joking, because there's no way a melon would fit whole inside a belly. No way right?! Way.

Here's proof:
(and I took and edited these pictures myself, only so I could insert here that "selfie" was nominated Word of Year 2013. It's a sad sad world you're coming into, baby, sorry about that.)

So yeah, way! Whole melon right there!

This was a big week: Daddy and I participated in Antenatal/Parenting classes during the weekend and it was great! We met other first-time mums and dads from the Ashburton area and Cara the instructor was so nice and helpful and answered all my never-ending questions. On a side note, I baked oatmeal raisin cookies and over heard people commenting on how good they were. Yeah!

We talked about labour and pain and all the things that can happen, we visited the maternity centre to get a good feel for the place, we saw the birthing pool, we learned about hormones, breastfeeding and taking care of a newborn and so many other things. It was nice to know that every pregnant lady has the same fears and doubts I do. Daddy liked it too and it made me love him just a little bit more, because in general he hates lessons and classes, but this one was very important and he really stepped up.

I'm feeling great even with the heartburn still going strong. The Bump is huge but beautiful and you keep squirming and squiggling like there's no tomorrow. I waddle ( = to walk like a penguin.) now and make grunting noises when getting up from the couch. I believe I'll give up the couch soon and just park my large pregnant bum on the computer chair that offers good back support and no grunting. It's taking me a bit longer to settle down, but sleeping is still my favourite sport and I do it beautifully. Still haven't got that haircut sorted, so hang in there. And birth favours are driving me mad, because I can't find anymore Owlivers to buy.

Only a couple of weeks till Grandma and Granpa and Sandra and Julio arrive, it's so exciting!

I do have this nagging feeling we should be doing more, buying more stuff like endless books, crayons, swimming togs, cricket bats and superhero costumes. I feel like I want to be prepared right now for your whole life, birth to college.

We learned in class that one of the early signs of labour is Nesting, a feeling you have to complete projects and have your "nest" clean and ready for baby. At 35 weeks, I can't tell if my sudden urge to clean the fridge and kitchen drawers is "nesting" or just a normal Tuesday in my life. I cleaned it anyway.

What I also did this week: decorated the Christmas tree. Looks awesome!

Tuesday, 19 November 2013

Week 34 - Cantaloupe Baby

Hey baby!

For the record, when we were at the produce shop on Sunday, I held up a cantaloupe and you feel a lot bigger. And oh the moves you make, my little John Travolta. Sometimes my belly stretches to the side or to the front and I have a distinct feeling you're trying to grab whatever it is I'm eating holding. We call you Alien-Baby, because the resemblance is totally there.
During the few moments when you're not moving, stretching, rolling, squiggling, squirming, doing backflips or diving into the deep end of my poor body, my belly is actually cute, very round but not too big. Enough to leave me breathless, because you're taking up all that precious lung space. Bending forward is out of the question and usually met with a grunt,  but in a last heroic glimpse of vanity, I managed to paint my toenails today. Next week, haircut!

I confess having a "turtle" moment today, when I was lying flat on the couch and suddenly could not get up the normal way of rolling upwards, so I just lay there, waving my arms and legs, like a panicked upside down turtle. Not pretty, but funny. The whole reason why we didn't go camping with friends last weekend. I can't be trusted on low surfaces anymore, I may never be able to get up again.

Not a lot happening on the outside world, to be honest. We finally got that shelf in the nursery. The shopping check-list is done, tiny little clothes are washed, hospital bags are perfectly packed, Christmas is fast approaching and my mind is trying to figure out if I should prepare for it, ignore it or assume you'll be here by then. Or if I'll be in labor while the rest of NZ eats turkey. This thing were we don't know the exact date of your arrival drives me crazy.

Crazy, because planning is my thing and if I can't plan and organize, the world as we know it may collapse in a state of chaos. But crazy is better than anxious, I guess.

I'm not anxious yet. I'm enjoying this pregnancy very much and will carry many good memories from it. No need to hurry, baby, unless your original plan is to be a New Year's Eve baby. If you're thinking about the drama effect, just drop it right now young man! Hurry all you want. We are, at least on the outside, ready for you. But please, I really need that haircut, so hang in there for a little while longer. Oh, and we have antenatal/parenting/birthing classes this weekend, so maybe wait untill we actually know how to change a nappy? Thanks.

34 weeks, only 6 to go. How can this be, if only yesterday I was holding that stick with a faint second line?

This is last week's bump picture, not that great, but we keep forgetting to take them! Can't wait for Tatiana to take some really good ones!

What I'm reading: blogs I keep losing track of, news articles that make me angry, "The book thief" made me cry, Twitter makes me laugh. Just read this and want to share:

Things I wish I'd known before

Wednesday, 6 November 2013

Week 32 - Bok Choy Baby and a BIG thank you

Hey baby!

I can understand the lenght of a bok choy, but volumetric-ly speaking, it feels like I've eaten a cantaloupe whole. The Bump doubles in size every morning. You're huge. You've got the moves like Jagger, my son. Some pretty painful ones lately.

Ok, getting down to business. Last Friday, Nov 1st, our amazing friends got together to celebrate your arrival. It's called a baby shower and involves some good food, cute baby themed decorations, games for the parents-to-be, cake and heaps of presents. You are going to be a very well-dressed baby thanks to them; we got gorgeous clothes, blankets, lotions and even a rubber duck! The best surprise ever.

A baby shower is a tradition for new mums and dads, and as much as I wanted to throw it myself (trust me, the planning in my mind was beautiful, with theme, checklists, suppliers, shopping lists and plan of action. It was going to be epic.), we had two problems. One was Preston, the lovely mechanic who fixed our cars and took all our money. Second problem and a lot harder to fix, was the fact that we live in New Zealand.

You see, my mom, aunties, in-laws, nieces, bffs, cousins, friends, all the ladies and gents who are very happy about your existence, are NOT in New Zealand. They are far far away. All my life, they were always in this dream-picture of my baby shower, we'd be having tea, playing games and dishing advice on how to deal with cracked nipples and that sort of thing you say to a new mom. I felt a big hole whenever I thought of having a baby shower without them. I felt like I'd be betraying them, depriving them of celebrating you.

Then these fantastic women came along and fixed it. Everything was done to perfection, the food was great as usual, the love was overflowing, so much fun was had. They planned, shopped, cooked, decorated, made something beautiful out of a long lost dream. They showed me how loved you are. They told me, with a ribbon-laced-diaper-cake, that this is YOUR family and our family, the friends we chose to share our lifes with here in New Zealand. I still miss all those people, but know you won't have to. I feel showered with blessings.

 For that I'll be forever grateful, beyond words. Humbled by a display of affection I did not expect.
Thank you thank you thank you, a thousand times. One for each ribbon, ballon, cupcake, coxinha and marshmellow. Thank you.


What I'm doing right now: I'm trying on a moby wrap, which is mainly a large stretchy lenght of fabric that ties you to myself. Except you're still inside, so I'm using a borrowed baby doll (the size of a 7month old baby). All that on top of The Bump. Pepsi is about as confused as he could possibly be. Well, aren't we all?

Sunday, 3 November 2013

Surprise Baby Shower

Hey baby!

We had the most amazing surprise on Friday night: our fantastic friends were kind enough to throw a baby shower in your honour! I have a very long and heartfelt Thank You letter to write them and will tell you all about how it went, but right now I'm just gonna put up some pictures, ok?

Wednesday, 30 October 2013

Week 31 - Coconut baby

"She put the lime in the coconut, she drank them both up." A whole week of that stinking song in my brain.

Hey baby!

Could you kindly remove your feet from my right ribcage, please? Thank you. 
Although Hannah assessed today that you're still in the same bum-to-the-moon position, right now it feels like a full horizontal stretch, tiger-in-the-sun style, making my belly morph into the oddest of shapes.

We are doing great, you are growing perfectly and we got our birth plan done today too. Scary stuff, heaps of decisions. Between the birth plan, the capsule/car seat thing and ordering a cake at the supermarket, I'm all out of decision making power. 

So...yesterday was my birthday! Birthdays are great fun, were everyone tells you how amazing you are, you feel loved all around, eat cake with your name on it and get presents. It's a major occasion, you'll love it for sure! Of course, your actual birth day has been more on my mind lately (and everyone else's, who wished great things for you too. People seem to think I'm going to be a good mum. Hum. What do you say?).

Overall, it was a quiet celebration sort of day, because Daddy was working and it fell on a Tuesday which is the most boring day of the week. We got to celebrate together, Daddy and I and The Bump, in Hanmer Springs last week, as you can see in the picture below. Stayed at a great hotel, it was pouring down rain, went to the pools, the sun came out for a bit, went out to dinner, it was lovely and unforgettable, an amazing memory to cherish of a very short and happy babymoon. We saw a couple at the pools with the baby (outside) in the capsule, maybe you'll get lucky and we'll pop over there sooner than we thought!

We'll celebrate again on Friday with our friends - and more cake yay! Pictures to come, I promise.

I'm confident that The Bump has doubled in size in the last few weeks. Each time I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror, there's a brief moment of doubt, of incredulity. Every time, who is that person? That grown-up lady, growing a tiny human inside? Wasn't I out of school just yesterday, or so it seems?  

I'm 8 months pregnant now, it's the home stretch, the last quarter, and still everyday feels surreal, every single day I put my hands on my squirmy middle and try to comprehend the enormity of you and us, how are going to do this?? It baffles me. Will you by any chance come out holding a big book of instructions?

At 30 years old and more than a little bit scared, I'm cooking inside of me the best gift life has ever given me. Great birthday, if you ask anyone.

Wednesday, 23 October 2013


Hey baby!

You probably realized by now, but your mommy is fueled by music. Every minute of every day, singing, listening, thinking about it. So today I thought I'd shared this one with you; it's called "Heaven", by Bryan Adams.

This song was my favourite for many years, and this album is probably still on my Top 10 of all times because I am a sappy romantic and Mr. Adams, all the way from Canada, has a lot to say about love.

I'm a week away of turning 30 years old, taking stock of life as usual and thinking that back in the old days, when I was a 15-year-old-nerdy-chubby-eyeliner-ponytail and hairband wearing-girl, I never thought this kind of amazement would actually happen.

I assumed that life would take some turns and twists, I'd have a career, maybe a boyfriend, a flat, Sunday lunches with the family, long drives to work, that kind of normalcy, but never presumed it would really be this amazing, this far away from anything I've ever dreamt, this different and scary and exciting.

Right now, this is heaven. This is as close to perfect as one can ever hope for. And I'll tell you what? Your Daddy and I, we are far from perfect people and we have many flaws. We fight sometimes, we misunderstand each other, we struggle with expectations. We don't have a lot of money, we don't own a house, we have many unfulfilled and shattered dreams and not an inch of the glamour my old city-living-self craved. God only knows how I used to long for things I still don't have, things I see now are only made of money.

But this? Being almost 30 and in this weird world, right next to your Daddy everyday with unwavering affection, knowing we are loved by family, we have health to carry on, having you kicking around in my belly, you making me more and more beautiful and happy with each breath of expanding Bump. This is heaven.

Turning the love between two people into a real tiny person. It's a superpower, it's a blessing, it's probably the scariest thing ever, it's the best birthday present I could ever dream of.
I don't mind having to wait for it. Patience, you'll find out soon, it's a quality I possess by bucket-loads.

Heaven. Gratitude. Heaven.

Saturday, 19 October 2013


Hey baby!

I know I told you about your room, but today I took some pictures because someone asked me to, so I thought I could share them here, so people can see how cute your nursery is looking.

It's pretty much done, we may install a shelf at some stage. I didn't want a lot of frilly baby things, just the basics and some homemade decorations, like the pompoms and framed name. The pukeko mobile was a lovely gift from Jennie and the little boy door thing was a gift from Grandma Silvia And you can't see in the pictures, but the walls were all scribbled by Daddy and I with drawings and some good quotes.

My favorite quote is the one that I wrote right above your crib: "Wake up and be awesome". I have no doubt you're going to be awesome! Like Barney Stinson awesome.

So check it out:

I hope you like it, we certainly do!

Friday, 18 October 2013

Week 30 - Cabbage Baby

Hey baby!

Week 30. Oh God. Are you sure?? That "3" in front just makes everything so.....urgent. Like I'll barely have time to blink and you'll be here, blinking back at me with sleepy crying eyes. Bright side: we got you a swing, very cute, plays music and all.

I just came from an appointment with Hannah and she says we are fine, but my blood tests showed a lack of iron which will be corrected with tablets. She measured you (30cm, spot on as it should be) and found out your position. Right now, your head is buried somewhere in my insides and your bum is sticking out the top of my belly, with the legs on the right hand side. It's actually funny, because there's an old saying in Brazil that says that when you're born with "your bum facing the Moon" like that, it means you'll be lucky in life! So keep up, bottoms up!

And also right now, I am wearing short shorts! (last year's shorts still fit perfectly, score!). Which means the temperature outside has gone over 22 degrees. Which means it's so nice and hot! Which means summer is coming and I'm very close to jumping with joy. The cold makes me very uncomfortable (and it's been around since March!) and the arrival of hot sunny days is a cause for celebration! I can't wait to wear long flowing dresses over the growing bump and to have some color on my skin.

You know what else deserves an international holiday? In a couple of days, your grandparents will celebrate their 35th wedding anniversary. 35 years of being together through thick and thin, of raising two children and now with the first grandchild on the way. We are all blessed to be a fruit of their love and devotion to each other and I give thanks everyday to be a part of their love story.

Oh, did I mention you have an email account? Well you do. I know, I have issues. Mostly I have username issues: I could not bear to think that in some 12-odd-years, you were going to end up with a horrible username because your own name was taken. So I got that taken care of, and your email is oliver.m.macario@gmail.com. You can thank me later. (*Friends and relatives are more than welcome to send baby Oliver a note, message or long description of life outside the womb*)!

We have a busy few days ahead and next week Daddy and I are going to Hanmer for a break and to celebrate my own 30th birthday, but we can cover the awesomeness of Mum in a next post, right?

What I'm loving oh so much: Whittaker's Milk Strawberry Chocolate. Not only it's the most delicious chocolate ever, but some of the proceeds of sale go to Breast Cancer research, as October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Fingers crossed they don't stop making it after the month is up.

Friday, 11 October 2013

Week 29 - Squash baby

Hey baby,

First of all, would you please stop kicking me? I love you, but you're squeezing my insides and moving around so much it makes me nauseous. Have you tried eating a meal then having someone stomping on your stomach?! Today I caught myself doing the "evil mom stare" down to my own belly button because you were doing a high-kick - splits - pirouettes routine and it worked, you stopped right away! Mom wins - for 5 minutes. On the bright side, I know you're happy when I eat and when I seat down, not so much when I lift up my shirt or bend forward. I have a new policy of sleeping with The Bump touching your Daddy's back, so you can kick him too. He loves it, carry on.

You also love yoga and I've been doing more and more of it to get in the birth mindset.

I'm considering dropping the fruit/vegetable comparison thing because it's starting to freak me out. Butternut squash for week 29?! It's enormous, there's no way you're that big. (She says, in denial, as her belly button now enters a room a full minute before the boobs arrive.)

We had a good week out here that started with some spring planting of a vegetable garden - no squashes! - then some spring snow! Weather is a funny thing, you'll learn soon, as it rules our lifes in the country.

My latest concern is to pack a hospital bag. Apparently it's a big deal, and from all the lists I got off the internet, I have about 3 items. A lot of shopping still involved, no matter how many items I tick off the essentials list. We got a baby monitor this week, very cute, simple sound-only kind, but enough for our needs (and our budget).  Next, I got my eyes on a swing on TradeMe. And we got presents in the mail yesterday, from a very nice friend in Brazil who wishes nothing but good things to you.

Good things. You know, we wish for nothing but good things to you, but know that you are going to grow up and maybe bad things will happen. Accidents, deaths, the flu, broken heart, stubbed toes. You're not here yet, but I'm already freaking out about those things. What scares me the most is that I'll be so worried and scared all the time that I'll forget about the good things.I'm scared squared.

Would you be ok with a bubble-wrap outfit from birth till, lets say, 18 years old? OK, a little overboard, I get it. I'll have words with your guardian angels, make sure they are on a 4 angels/6h a day roster, just to be safe.

What I'm making: lists. To do, to buy, to make, to send, to clean. My brain is a fuzzy mess, I need all the help I can get.

Friday, 4 October 2013

Week 28 - Lettuce Baby

Hey baby,

To be honest, I tried to find a better size comparison  than an iceberg lettuce, because really? Not only an iceberg lettuce is totally smaller than the cauliflower from week 27, but it's also bland and makes little sense. Couldn't find one, so we're stuck for the week, sorry.

Speaking of stuck, I am stuck with a horrible cold (again!) and feeling miserable.
At about the same time the cold arrived, my friend Jennie arrived to stay for a week, so instead of a boring pregnant friend, she got a boring pregnant sick friend! Not much fun for her, but I really enjoyed her company this week.
After she arrived on Monday, we had a great day in town and barbecue with our group of friends. On Tuesday and Wednesday we did nothing but play with Pepsi and yesterday we visited Kirsty at her house, after pie at the Darfield Bakery. Good pies and good times! I'm a bit sad I had to drop her off at the bus this morning, I miss my girl friends terribly.
Overall a nice week, but I'm feeling like a tractor has run me over with a heavy roller and left dark circles under my eyes.
You, on the other hand, are probably practicing your aerobics routine, with a special interest in  jazz-exercise. This very minute, my belly looks like there's a tsunami going on inside and trying to escape.

So after all this excitement, I need a nap, so we'll keep it short and sweet.

What I'm eating and you're enjoying very much: roast chicken and creamy polenta, lemon poppy seed cake, chicken bacon and cheese pie, lots and lots of manuka honey.

Wednesday, 25 September 2013

Week 26 - Eggplant Baby

Hey baby!

Just for the record, I love eggplants (I even look like one on the picture, look!) and even though they cost an arm and a leg around here, I bought one this week to celebrate how big you are. I plan on having it parmigiana-style, in case you are wondering.

Last week was Zucchini week, but I'm guessing they were basing this on an abnormaly large prize-zucchini because, boy you are expanding like a balloon inside of me. I hope you are happy and warm and well-fed. We can feel you move a lot and respond to touch. I noticed that you are not a fan of cold, like your mommy, but don't worry, because Nana is knitting some nice cute wooly things for you. I'm very sorry, but my knitting skills are very limited. I can fold a mean origami though, if that helps on the craft department.

The main reason I didn't write anything last week was lack of power. Not mine, although being pregnant has taught me that there are things I have no power over, like my hunger, my heartburn, my bladder and the crazy crying.

No, we had a major storm, with very strong gusts of wind that blew heaps of trees over the power lines and knocked us out of the grid for almost 8 days. It was not fun at all having to shower at other people's houses, cooking on a little gas burner, using torches and no heat pump or wi-fi. Thank God - and the linemen - that is now history and our home is back to its nice and warm self.

This week I've been thinking a lot about being a role-model and how I don't wish on you a few traits that we have. For example, if I have it my way, you will believe until the age of 15 that Mommy lives on nothing but smiles and water, because I cannot ever let you see what a horrible picky eater I am. Or how scattered-brain I am. Or a terrible athlete. No. I have to make you better than we are, you will be a sum bigger than its parts.
If I never do anything else in my whole life again, Bean, I will make sure that you are a great person, better than we are.

I know, not even born yet and such high expectations, right?? Geez lady, back off won't you?!?
The painful truth is, I have very high expectations of what kind of mom I'll be, mainly because I've never, ever - ever - wanted to be anything more than your mom.
I'm sorry to say, but I'm not ambitious (and I wish fervently that you are!) and just the thought of being your mom makes me completely fulfilled, like I'm finally taking a test I've been studying my whole life for.

So...I guess I'm apologizing in advanced because I can see the future, and it tells me that we are going to butt heads at some stage; this whole "role-model/expectations" thing may fall short sometimes and you'll see that, while wanting you to be the best person you can be, I am not.

I am watching: Jamie Oliver, my daily torture. He always makes something sooooo delicious-looking and so easy and makes my mouth water around dinner time. It's not nice, because I never have a single ingredient for nothing he ever cooks. Like now, he's making Pasta Primavera with asparagus and peas and smoked fish and mint. All I have in my pantry is the pasta. Forever disappointed.

Sunday, 8 September 2013

Week 24 - Grapefruit Baby

Hey baby!

Right now is Sunday night after a glorious weekend of sunshine that made Daddy and I go out and about and laugh and enjoy every second of his time off.

The highlight of it all was you, of course. We got you a stroller! It was most exciting buying it, but getting it home and assemblying all its bits and pieces was a challenge, so I'll say that was parenthood challenge number 2, check! (First one, I assume, is not running away screaming in panic once the test is positive. I didn't, so, check!)

And the cherry on the transportation sundae was visiting Gian and picking up the capsule we borrowed, so now you're sorted to go out in style!

Just in case you're curious, the stroller we got you is this one here and its name is Bob, look:
So in the grand scheme of things, we are happily on our way, baby. You've got a pretty nursery, a cot with sheets and blankets, a stroller, nappies, a play gym, a few stuffed toys, books and some clothing. The list however, is not even close to finished. Baby monitor, Ergobaby, carseat, lots of luxuries for such a tiny creature!

We're almost 3 months away of seeing you and so much....stuff to be done! The garden is being planned as we speak and right now I'm thinking of some other things that need to be fixed (my GHD iron) and sorted (gahhh our visas) before you arrive, not to mention all the dreams I have of travelling, celebrating my birthday and even a bump photoshoot that are not likely to happen, but I can dream anyway.

Dream is cheap: there's a lesson you're never to young to learn.
Dreaming is free and it will take you everywhere!

Is actually difficult to think of anything else, really.

Wednesday, 4 September 2013

Week 23 - Pomegranate Baby

Hey baby!

Actually week 23 is almost over, but I love the word pomegranate, so I needed to register it anyway.

It's been a pretty quiet week around here. Right now there's a major storm outside, rain, hail, wind, but you and I and Pepsi and the cat are very cozy inside, just listening to the howling and eating delicious orange cake. You, bean, has made me verociously hungry, and the heartburn that follows is equally verocious.
I'm sure it's a trick designed by your genius mastermind to keep me awake, so I can stare into my own belly-button for hours on end, feeling you fly around the trapeze and jumping on the trampoline I know it's in there.

Did you know that even though you're not born yet, there's a lot of people that love you already? Yes, I mean more than 2!  Probably more than 10 even! Let's start with the family...

Pepsi and the cat, who are not "officially" people, but love you anyway. I hope...

Grandma Ligia and Grandpa Kiko (the two in the end), and Uncle Du and Antie Bru (the two pretty ones in the middle)

There's Grandpa Antero and Grandma Silvia

A multitude of uncles, aunties, cousins....everybody is very excited and waiting for you, bean!

Also, bean, there's another category of people, they are called "friends". They are the family your heart choses. Mum and Dad are blessed, because we have some of those too! And from the moment we told them you were joining the party, our friends became your friends too, how amazing is that?!

You weight around 500g now, lighter than a Harry Potter book, and already have so many people that love you. You have friends all the way from New Zealand to Brazil and back. And those people are going to make you laugh and cry, will get you in trouble, will help you with math problems and girl problems, will make your life better in every way just by being there. And if at some stage, they say they "know you from the womb" it's because they mean it, so no eye-rolling, young man!

It means that they know how much you were wanted and loved from the moment the little faint line showed up in our lives. In our lives and their lives. They will be your aunties and uncles and cousins and brothers and sisters. Your family from the heart.
It takes a village to raise a child, or so they say. Our village is gigantic, bean, so never fear. We'll be just fine.

What I have been doing: baking. I usually love it anyway, but I guess you love it more than I do! Meringues, focaccia, bread, cakes, pies. You name it, I'll be in the kitchen up my elbows in butter in flour! If I become a fat mama with flabby arms, I'm blaming you.